French People

French people always figured out the best thing on the menu. They ordered appetizers first and then they ordered salads and soups and they ordered their meal and then they had dessert. They didn’t ask me about fat. They weren’t allergic to anything.

They came in late and by the time they got their meal we were finished and waiting to go home. We had cashed everyone else out and swept the floors. We had cleaned the bathroom, refilled the sugars, the salts and peppers, and set all the other tables for breakfast the next day. The dishwashers sat at a table in the corner but they didn’t mind waiting around. They were Mexican and they were patient. The French people smoked and talked and just when you thought they might leave, they all wanted espresso.

I wanted to sit down at their table. I wanted to be French like them and go home with a French husband and have French children and go on vacations and not sulk, the Americans always sulked on their vacations, and I wanted to go to restaurants and eat everything I wanted and not gain weight.

My coworker told me she always imagined her customers having sex, a thought that, quite frankly, had never occurred to me. I didn’t imagine my customers having sex but I did imagine being their friend, being one of them instead of myself, being on vacation, instead of thinking about salad dressing.